Rug Pulled In-sight

for feeling right again

 

The Story

An over-used analogy, to be sure, but with no equal to describe the visceral, bottom-out feeling of something in your life immediately being taken away. Utterly shocking, utterly devastating, gut-wrenching, confounding, blind-sided, mindless, random, awful...shall I go on?

So, you have this visual. You, going along. Your life was one way, Happy, maybe. But even if not happy, known. Or so you thought. Then ____. There it goes. I have had this happen twice. There have been other smaller occurrences; but, for me, the majors hit twice. Same person. Similar occurrence. Fooled me twice. THAT was the most gut-wrenching part. Not the infraction so much as the rug. The life I thought I knew then - wham - it no longer existed. And I was trapped. Between the life I knew and thought I wanted (that never truly existed? We'll get back to that.), and moving on, which I resisted because it was scary and ultimately I wanted what didn't exist. Talk about being between a rock and a hard place.

The In-sight

So, what do you do when the rug is pulled? You fall. You fall HARD. You land in mines and pits and holes and darkness and numbness that consumes all light. I even wrote a song about it. The second time around, I didn't even feel pain any more. Well, I did, but then it went beyond. I went beyond, couldn’t even feel numb. I dulled out. Went dead inside. Nothing mattered. But I had a lifeline. Some thread in me, that I've mentioned before. Not everyone has this thread or access to this kind of inner lifeline. Let this, let me, be your thread with these words: You will come back. You will feel again. You will be okay. Not now. It's okay to not be okay now. Just hang in there. 

So, what do you DO when the rug is pulled? Breathe. You'll surface when you are ready.

That rug was just a rug. See it? It was dirty and tattered, anyway. There was ground underneath.

YOU are that ground.

Variations, Tips, and Possibilities

  • That feeling. That feeling of, ugh, I don’t even know…nothing. Of having it figured out, then nothing. Of desperation, emptiness, violation, pain, then trapped-ness. It’ll pass. You WILL make it through.

  • When you are ready, first try The Darkened Sun In-sight.

  • Then, maybe the Piece of Thread In-sight or the Swirling Tornado In-sight.

  • Eventually, you’ll be ready (you will be; it’s okay if you’re not; but maybe you are and only you would know) for the Finding the Light In-sight.

  • Also, you might try Process Infinity, introduced in one of my recent BLOGS.