Pushing Away In-sight
for tuning out the negative
The Story
I find that there are things in my life I have to inwardly, visually, push away. People and negative energy, most of all. But this takes personal insight, time, and practice and, even then, we all fall victim to the affectation of people and things around us. I am still affected by certain kinds of people, for example. Vacuum-hole people are a weakness of mine, as are arrogant, bully, mean-girl or manipulative guy types. These people tap into my need to be of service and my vulnerable, insecure self that is always there, even when I have reason to be strong, confident, and feel proud and great. I can't help it. But, oh yes, I can.
I create a shield. I use a couple different visuals for this, daily, but not in a way that isolates; in such a way that creates and maintains a safe place for me being me and allows my creative existence, comfortability, and growth. It is, of course, not as easy as it sounds. But pick one of these and see if it works for you. Interchange them if you need to, like I do, according to what it is you are trying to keep out. Make your life a safe space. Not in a head-in-the-sand kind of way; but in a way that protects you from the things that have no business being in your world.
I love my family. Let me start with that. But they are my biggest weakness and vulnerability because, I, like many, want idyllic. I want a family that loves me for me, supports me in everything, and loves me no matter what. They do...but only to their own capacity; what I have found, over the years, is I cannot rely on what I expect and hope from them. They give (and take) what they do (and they can be generous)...but, sadly, I have nothing to do with it. No one has ever asked me what I want or need out of the equation. They are kind, but then not encouraging, not caring to understand me or my actual life, only the one they think they understand...see how easy it is for me to trickle down that road? I get sad. Disheartened. I feel these emotions gently prodding at me now...so sneaky. But then, there's the wall. The beautiful, thin, clear wall. I push away and fall behind it. I can see those things, but they are there, outside. In here, I am okay. I am me, strong, and amazing, and beautiful in all my craziness. So are you.
The In-sight
I am a self-admitted sci-fi, super hero, and young-adult-novel loving nerd. I grew up on Harry Potter and unabashedly love the Twilight books and movies. Please don't let this affect your opinion of me in a respect-related or negative way...we all have our candy. The reason I bring this up is a visual evoked by this vampire series. Spoiler alert - The main character, Bella, is what is later referred to as a shield. Edward, who reads minds, cannot read hers from the beginning and, when Bella becomes a vampire, this shielding becomes her own superpower that she can even project to shield others. Use this visual to help stave off the naysayers and the negatives in your life. Anything you don't want to enter in and affect your inner self, push away and outside.
Another example is actually visually, internally pushing away. I am not an advocate of solving problems with any kind of violence. However, sometimes it help, especially if there is a particular person who has a habit of getting under your skin or if there is just a particular kind of story or thing you don't want to enter in. Envision physically pushing this or them away. Don't do it. Just imagine it. I use this with tragic news sometimes. I want to know what is going on in the world. But I also know my own tendency to internalize this sadness and tragedy. So, once I hear of awfulness, especially violence, I see it as a something I have to physically push away and keep at bay in my head. You may even try holding this thought or thing, compassionately, but holding it apart and away, where it cannot touch your inner psyche. People share with me all kinds of hardships, sadnesses and pains in this line of work. It takes practice to be able to share in these hardships, and not let them seep in. If I let everything in, I would not be able to help anyone. I would be overcome by all of it. The same holds true for you. Be kind, be loving, be compassionate. But also be these things for yourself so you can still be them for you and the world.
Variations, Tips, and Possibilities
Another variation of this in-sight is the Shooting Bollards In-sight for more immediate reprieve and a powerful visual.
Think of your world as a bubble. You can see out, but you can also only let in what you choose, deflecting or pushing away that which does not help you. You are greatness in your bubble world, and your greatness will shine and grow from within to far from without and beyond.